Thursday, 5 September 2013

Free to good home: Wasps!

Free to good home: Wasps incl. nest (by collection only)

Be the envy of all of your friends with these delightful insects, marvel at their colours, be soothed by their incredibly loud buzzing, be "that guy/ girl with a wasps nest"!

But wait, there's more!
Home security a concern? Position your new nest near your back door, shed, or windows. Wasps are the perfect guards, full of fury and indiscriminate anger.
Bored? Did someone say "social wasps"! Never be alone again, whether in the garden (got some flowers that need pollinating?), at the pub (the perfect wingmen), or just sitting at home watching a DVD (wasps f**king love movies!), wasps can be there with you.
Still bored? Tether a bunch of them your Nintendo Wii controller or something...

Did someone say "ovipositor"?
Because wasps have got one! They could be yours!

But wait, there's more!

Wasps might not make honey, but they do make something which lasts even longer. Memories!
Remember that time John brought wasps to his brother's wedding? Or the Winter Wasps Wonderland? You will!

Ladies! The Queen Wasp probably loves rewatching 'Dirty Dancing' and eating ice-cream.

Gents! (& ladies) Did you know that the Queen Wasp stores the males semen between the end of one Summer and the start of the next? That's basically a free sperm bank, just in case of unforeseen circumstances.

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